SCP-4153 - Vincent Price Presents… IT CAME FROM SITE-9!
“Why does anyone try to frighten? It's fun to be frightened. Almost as much fun as it is to do the frightening.”
SCP-090 - Apocorubik’s Cube
“We observed a six segment alignment today on the 1st side. It was noted and passed without incident. Two hours later, a research assistant returned from the break room with news that a tsunami had occurred in the Indian Ocean...”
SCP-089 - Tophet
“While the role of SCP-089 in actually causing Type-S Events is unclear, experience has demonstrated that the prompt and precise application of Protocol M8 is effective in limiting the damage that they do.”
SCP-649-2568-J - Technicolor Geography
SCP 649-2568 has shown a capacity to reshape any geological features it sees, or has heard described. These reshaping events exclusively affect any features the entity deems as "too flat".
SCP-088 - The Lizard King
…Affected personnel underwent a painful mutation after which they shared the physical characteristics of SCP-088.
SCP-087 - The Stairwell
“She still sounds far away. I don't feel like I'm getting any closer. It's like for every step I take, she takes one down.”
SCP-100000-J - Procedure 110-Overkill
The outer sarcophagus must, at all times, receive broadcasts… [of] live monologues of how awful SCP-100000-J is and why it will never, ever escape, destroy humanity, or find true love.
SCP-1322-J - A Whole New World
Barnes attempts to enter the anomaly for 23 minutes, but is blocked by SCP-1322-J-1-Barnes. Testing ends after SCP-1322-J-1-Barnes becomes aggressive.
SCP-5740 - all cop are buddy by dado
“dado is only purveyor of fine business and excellent salesman, like the bezos or 420 elon.”
SCP-1762 - Where The Dragons Went
“It's strange to see how much your world has changed; it is even stranger to see how we now appear in this place. In Fantasy, we are much bigger. Or maybe you've grown taller?”
SCP-086 - The Office of Dr. [REDACTED]
“Although we appreciate SCP-086's conscientiousness, there is at this time no pressing reason to classify it as "Euclid". If circumstances change, we'll reconsider.”
SCP-885-J - Researcher Jacobs’ Inability To Clean Up After Himself
Investigations into how an actual human being could live like that are ongoing.
SCP-085 - Hand-drawn “Cassy”
Personnel report that [SCP-085] is amicable and motivated, albeit lonely.
SCP-084 - Static Tower
One subject from ██████████ █████, found on the grass plane, reported he had been traveling for six years. He was found approximately four hundred meters from ██████████ █████ city limits.
![SCP-6327-J - [redacted for brevity]](https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/5ec85e2d4c483c5e7cb97193/1677121541297-LFWH50V3ICXE2H2BQYCO/Joke+Series+%28website%29+%282023+update%29.png)
SCP-6327-J - [redacted for brevity]
“There is a current and present emergency, and I am about to describe it. Please listen carefully, as this will contain important information.”
SCP-4966 - Tubbioca: Devourer of Souls, Consumer of Secrets, Lord of Munchies
“The pat people who visit me. They tell the red people stuff through the head parts.”
SCP-083 - An Abandoned Row Home
Both groups [of personnel] inside the property not only described very different living conditions, but their descriptions didn't even correspond to the same floor plan.
Quaran-tainment, Episode 5 - "Society for Cryptids in the Earthly Plane”
“I think you may have got the wrong person,” I said. “I’m Angela Harris, and I’ve been a human my whole life.”