SCP-087 - The Stairwell
“She still sounds far away. I don't feel like I'm getting any closer. It's like for every step I take, she takes one down.”
SCP-100000-J - Procedure 110-Overkill
The outer sarcophagus must, at all times, receive broadcasts… [of] live monologues of how awful SCP-100000-J is and why it will never, ever escape, destroy humanity, or find true love.
SCP-1322-J - A Whole New World
Barnes attempts to enter the anomaly for 23 minutes, but is blocked by SCP-1322-J-1-Barnes. Testing ends after SCP-1322-J-1-Barnes becomes aggressive.
SCP-5740 - all cop are buddy by dado
“dado is only purveyor of fine business and excellent salesman, like the bezos or 420 elon.”
SCP-1762 - Where The Dragons Went
“It's strange to see how much your world has changed; it is even stranger to see how we now appear in this place. In Fantasy, we are much bigger. Or maybe you've grown taller?”
SCP-086 - The Office of Dr. [REDACTED]
“Although we appreciate SCP-086's conscientiousness, there is at this time no pressing reason to classify it as "Euclid". If circumstances change, we'll reconsider.”
SCP-885-J - Researcher Jacobs’ Inability To Clean Up After Himself
Investigations into how an actual human being could live like that are ongoing.
SCP-085 - Hand-drawn “Cassy”
Personnel report that [SCP-085] is amicable and motivated, albeit lonely.
SCP-084 - Static Tower
One subject from ██████████ █████, found on the grass plane, reported he had been traveling for six years. He was found approximately four hundred meters from ██████████ █████ city limits.
![SCP-6327-J - [redacted for brevity]](https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/5ec85e2d4c483c5e7cb97193/1677121541297-LFWH50V3ICXE2H2BQYCO/Joke+Series+%28website%29+%282023+update%29.png)
SCP-6327-J - [redacted for brevity]
“There is a current and present emergency, and I am about to describe it. Please listen carefully, as this will contain important information.”
SCP-4966 - Tubbioca: Devourer of Souls, Consumer of Secrets, Lord of Munchies
“The pat people who visit me. They tell the red people stuff through the head parts.”
SCP-083 - An Abandoned Row Home
Both groups [of personnel] inside the property not only described very different living conditions, but their descriptions didn't even correspond to the same floor plan.
Quaran-tainment, Episode 5 - "Society for Cryptids in the Earthly Plane”
“I think you may have got the wrong person,” I said. “I’m Angela Harris, and I’ve been a human my whole life.”
SCP-082 - “Fernand” the Cannibal
When it speaks, it does so through enormous, clenched teeth. SCP-082 only parts teeth to eat food and to sing.
SCP-1162-J - “Double Down Sandwich”
In the case of containment compromise, full nuclear sterilization is considered automatically authorized.
SCP-081 - Spontaneous Combustion Virus
“Due to the United States’ current obesity epidemic, it is crucial that wild SCP-081 be eradicated.”
PILOT EPISODE: “SCP-080 - Dark Form”
Recorded March 2019 as a proof of concept for a potential series of other readings from the SCP Foundation. This podcast is the result.
Quaran-tainment, Episode 4 - "Doors”
She started down the hallway to our room. As I followed I couldn’t shake the feeling that something wasn’t right.