![Let Me Cure Her, Daddy [SCP-049-J]](https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/5ec85e2d4c483c5e7cb97193/1677119261460-R75MV2BQS75OGD4EIM7H/Joke+Series+%28website%29+%282023+update%29.png)
Let Me Cure Her, Daddy [SCP-049-J]
Beneath the rays of the last functional ceiling light stood a hideous thing that could only be described as a bird-faced ragdoll, gripping a sharp stick.
Boiled, Scrambled, and Fried [SCP-049-J]
There was nothing noticeably off about the plague doctor except for the strange stomach pains.
SCP-063-J - Non-Euclidean Geometries
Attempts to characterise the shape of SCP-063-J while empty… are ongoing but have been described as "frustrating" and "pointless".
SCP-OO1-J - KEEP CALM AND APOLLYON
This site has been destroyed by SCP-OO1-J, ergo, I can enjoy Petula Clark as much as I damn well please and only corpses will judge me.
SCP-2008-J - Cryptozoological life form
…The life form was observed to [wear] a hat bearing a mysterious emblem resembling the Greek letter rho, a jersey, and footwear (although not pants) — and to operate a four-wheeled vehicle.
SCP-020-J - A Pale Comparison
SCP-020-J was discovered outside Site-30's 5th-floor janitor closet alongside the corpses of Janitor Worth, five site guards, D-1221, and Dr. Cimmerian.
SCP-5280-J - Antiquated Measurement System
As of yet, SCP-5280-J has resisted all attempts at eradication.
SCP-HR009-J - Eye-Grabbing Clickbait Title
SCP-████ - Different Typeface Will Get Me Noticed
SCP-2128046979-J - You don’t know her, she works at a different Site!
…Colleagues who converse with Junior Researcher Jimmy have proven incapable of gleaning information about her whereabouts…
SCP-7800-J - The Five-Second Rule
Extraordinary Event 7800-J-17, the Jim Pepperoni's Five-Cheese Calzone Incident, is estimated to have saved Foundation staff at least $5.95.
SCP-1111-J - A Working Computer
Dr. Smallwood attempted to disable the stylised "helpful mascot" on the word processor. When he exited the program and then entered again, the mascot did not spontaneously activate.
SCP-8003-J - Why Bother?
[Containing SCP-8003-J] would be meaningless in the grand scheme of things, on the grounds that nobody's going to remember our names in a billion years.
![SCP-7000-J - Veni, Vidi, [DATA EXPUNGED]](https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/5ec85e2d4c483c5e7cb97193/1677120038909-6NUOPC68ZN98D99V03TC/Joke+Series+%28website%29+%282023+update%29.png)
SCP-7000-J - Veni, Vidi, [DATA EXPUNGED]
THE WORDS OF SUPREME DARKNESS ARE AS FOLLOWS
AND BY SPEAKING WHAT COMES, YE SHALL SUMMON HIM
FOR THESE WORDS ARE SUPREMELY DARK
SCP-900-J - Modern Major Keter-Class
This is the very model of an: SCP-900-J
Its object class is: Keter, so we’d rather that you’d stay away.
SCP-173-J - The Original “The Sculpture”
"It sounds like he's up for a pudding wrassle [sic]. It's okay, I'm pretty sure you can take him.”