SCP-146 - Bronze Head of Shame
"Stop. Take it back. Don't. I won't do it again. I'm sorry. I don't want to. Not again. Stop… Please…"
SCP-143 - The Bladewood Grove
The parent trees were owned by a family of traditionalist swordsmiths, claiming to be descended from a legendary sword maker named Amakuni.
SCP-1461 - House of the Worm
“I am what you have made me. I am choice and I am tyranny. Forgive me.”
SCP-5040-J - Stripèd Gangs
"Major Mime-11 has been lost, and with him nearly the entire North American supply of white gloves and black berets."
SCP-137 - The Real Toy
The toy was replaced by a full-sized Ferrari that attempted to race around the testing facility, ultimately crashing into the wall at high speed
SCP-136 - Naked Doll
"This thing is killing people. We haven’t learned anything new from it in ten years, and we can’t use it."
SCP-132 - Broken Desert
Clusters of contiguous instances have been internally consistent and have been confirmed to display areas of every major desert.
SCP-3333-J - Angsty Teenage Plant
SCP-3333-J apparently grows better when listening to songs by My Chemical Romance. It is allowed to do so as long as the volume is set to a reasonable level.
SCP-130 - Post Office
Over ██% of the mail is of a mundane nature... Exceptions to this are letters that were apparently unsent, for whatever reason, and temporally displaced letters.
SCP-123-J - Amazing Butter-like Substance!
When informed that the substance is not organic butter, subjects typically report disbelief.
SCP-128 - Kinetic Energy Entity
“Despite what the recovery log would say, this is not a poltergeist. ‘Poltergeist’ is an obsolete term, anyway.”
SCP-2845 - THE DEER
“I know that your organization doesn’t approve of the term, but it is still the case. The Stag is a god, and it is not a mild god of Earth.”
SCP-126 - Invisible Friend
Personnel interacting with SCP-126 must undergo regular psychiatric screening, and personnel exhibiting emotional attachment to SCP-126 must be administered a Class B amnestic and reassigned.
SCP-9119-J - Horrid Little Gustav
SCP-9119-J is to be lockey-locked away in a standard Bad Little Hideous Person Cage for all of eternity.
SCP-3008 - A Perfectly Normal, Regular Old IKEA
“The motto for this place should be ‘How Is That Even Possible’. Surely someone, somewhere must be looking for the thousands of people that must be in here.”
SCP-119 - Timecrowave
At power level 5, with an input of 999 seconds, the microwave will run for 999 seconds, and the contents will have aged… 31,529,964 years.
SCP-118 - Nuclear Protists
“Researchers and engineers at Research Sector █ have managed to create a prototype uranium enrichment device based on the principles employed by SCP-118.”
SCP-117 - Complete Multitool
However, if the user is faced with a specific task, regardless of what tool the subject intends to pull out and use, a tool perfectly fit for the task at hand will take its place.