BONUS: “More Like Rainbow Crapitalism” [SCP-4493]
An SCP Tale by ch00bakka [CC BY-SA 3.0].
The voice of the Database was provided by Joshua Alan Lindsay.
Incident 4493-1:
The following is a log of posts on Void, dated from 1 June through 7 June 2019, leading up to the creation and spread of SCP-4493 by POI-6870. Void is a social media platform akin to Twitter, used by people of paranormal communities from behind the Veil.
<BEGIN LOG>
Legolass Queenqueef
⁂elvendragqueen
so now that #PrideMonth has officially begun, how long do you think we've got until the first Woke Corporate Tweet?
ECHOES 19
HUMS 202
12:56 AM - 1 June 2019
The Factory
⁂the_factory
The Factory supports #pride. The Factory loves #LGBT. The Factory is producing #rainbow merchandise. Buy the merchandise. Let others know you are proud of your lifestyle with your purchasing decisions.
ECHOES 37
HUMS 199
1:00 AM - 1 June 2019
|
Legolass Queenqueef
⁂elvendragqueen
⁂the_factory Literally four minutes. Welcome to hell, girls and gays, it's only gonna get worse from here.
ECHOES 43
HUMS 371
1:13 AM - 1 June 2019
Iris Dark
⁂irisdark
As a proud #Trans #Lesbian and COO of ⁂mcd, I am living proof that #LGBT people can do whatever we set our minds to. Happy #pride to all my trans sisters!
ECHOES 99
HUMS 402
11:06 AM - 1 June 2019
antigamer aktion
⁂lesbian_gengar
mc&d are bloodsucking capitalists who keep literal unicorns in cages so they can sell their horns as morning-after pills for rich fucks but their boss is a lesbian so they're Woke now
ECHOES 2
HUMS 13
12:58 PM - 1 June 2019
bluntfiend
⁂jude_k2
I'd like to announce a new Mister Against Weed. His name is Mister Pinkwashing. And his power is to make corporations stop pretending that they give a shit about the gays. Coming soon to a pride parade near you.
ECHOES 1
HUMS 3
12:01 AM - 2 June 2019
|
Doctor Wondertainment™
⁂wondertainment
⁂jude_k2 Hey there! Just a quick reminder that #LittleMisters is the intellectual property of Dr. Wondertainment! Any attempts to create an infringing product will be met with legal action! Have a #Wondertaining day!
ECHOES 0
HUMS 1
12:04 AM - 2 June 2019
Marshall, Carter and Dark
⁂mcd
Happy #pride! Marshall, Carter and Dark is showing our support for the #LGBT community by donating a portion of all profits this month to the #HumanRightsCampaign to support their efforts to pass the #EqualityAct and ensure equal rights for all.
ECHOES 12
HUMS 20
9:49 AM - 2 June 2019
The Factory
⁂the_factory
In honor of #pride all Factory overseer drones will be equipped with #rainbow body armor and truncheons this month. Market research suggests that you will find this soothing. Buy our products. Support the Factory. Support the #LGBT.
ECHOES 53
HUMS 261
12:00 PM - 2 June 2019
|
antigamer aktion
⁂lesbian_gengar
⁂the_factory i hope everyone retweeting this doesn't know what the factory actually is. it isn't joking about the overseer drones. this isn't a funny parody account, it's a malevolent extradimensional parasite, and y'all should stop giving it a platform.
ECHOES 7
HUMS 69
2:16 PM - 2 June 2019
Anderson Robotics
⁂andersonrobotics
Anderson Robotics is proud to be a sponsor of the #ThreePortlands #PrideParade! Keep an eye out for our float, which will be escorted by Kestrel-series Domestic Utility Units painted in all the colors of the #rainbow!
ECHOES 11
HUMS 86
10:44 AM - 3 June 2019
Jumping Jehosephat
⁂jockjamsvol6
Oh, sure, when the police want to march in the parade everyone says that the first Pride was a riot, but when I want to loot an electronics store, everyone conveniently forgets??? Double standard much????
ECHOES 38
HUMS 551
2:12 PM - 3 June 2019
Doctor Wondertainment™
⁂wondertainment
For #Pride Month, Dr. Wondertainment® is releasing a new line of Rainbow-licious™ Bubblebath Bon-Bons!® Show your true colors with a rainbow of fun-filled foam! They'll be available by special order from ⁂mcd, but only as long as supplies last - so act fast!
ECHOES 7
HUMS 19
7:16 PM - 3 June 2019
UIU Portlands
⁂UIUPortlands
Happy #PrideMonth from the UIU. This month, the #UIU celebrates the diversity of our workforce and recognizes the contributions our LGBT colleagues have made in their service to the country and the Unit.
ECHOES 22
HUMS 46
7:27 AM - 4 June 2019
harmpit
⁂gunch
whil ethe fbi are all busy marhcing in hte prdie parade ill be dwonloading seven teraybte sof illeagl cogniothazards on thelibrary comptuers. if tey come to stop me tehy loes their queer streetc red and hvae to statr over froml evel one, ""ally-mnius"".
ECHOES 463
HUMS 3.2k
10:33 AM - 4 June 2019
Iris Dark
⁂irisdark
Iris Dark donated over £6,000,000 to homophobic MPs because she knew that a Tory government would give her a tax cut. She deliberately removed coverage for transgender healthcare from her employees' benefit packages because it would save her money. Happy #PrideMonth!
ECHOES 237
HUMS 812
7:06 PM - 4 June 2019
|
Iris Dark
⁂irisdark
Unfortunately, my account seems to have been hacked. I did not post this message, and I am unable to take it down. I am currently working with ⁂VoidSupport to resolve this issue.
ECHOES 101
HUMS 650
9:33 PM - 4 June 2019
Joyce Rand
⁂joyce.rand
Whoever hacked ⁂irisdark's account should feel ashamed of themselves! She is an inspiration and a role model, and this kind of petty slander is just embarassing.
ECHOES 2
HUMS 9
7:10 AM - 5 June 2019
|
Kiefless in Seattle
⁂polaricecraps
⁂joyce.rand
ECHOES 21
HUMS 53
11:51 AM - 5 June 2019
Marshall, Carter and Dark
⁂mcd
Marshall, Carter and Dark have possibly the worst human rights record of any corporation, anomalous or non-. We're going to go through this in no particular order, because /man/ does McD's have a lot of crimes to answer for. Let's do this. [1/???]
ECHOES 47
HUMS 563
9:30 AM - 5 June 2019
bluntfiend
⁂jude_k2
#pridehacker Listen, if I was going to make a new Mister Against Weed, I wouldn't have posted about it beforehand. I practice better security culture than that. You can all stop @ing me now.
ECHOES 3
HUMS 11
3:01 PM - 5 June 2019
Marshall, Carter and Dark
⁂mcd
⁂mcd … not to mention the sexual harassment many former MCD employees have reported, at the hands of both their superiors and their clients. And that's not even considering how MCD treats sex workers in their employ… [13/???]
ECHOES 22
HUMS 201
4:04 PM - 5 June 2019
UIU Portlands
⁂UIUPortlands
Google COINTELPRO. Or, for that matter, just check out the FBI files on it. This isn't explicitly about gay rights, but it's not like everyone they murdered was straight, you know? https://vault.fbi.gov/cointel-pro
ECHOES 79
HUMS 280
2:12 AM - 6 June 2019
Marshall, Carter and Dark
⁂mcd
⁂mcd … the immortal souls of innumerable queer men and trans women who died of AIDS-related complications, siphoned through an effigy located in their New York headquarters, which has since been relocated to an undisclosed location in sub-Saharan Africa… [27/???]
ECHOES 12
HUMS 20
3:45 AM - 6 June 2019
the stars are left
⁂syzygy
yooooooo the #pridehacker is in meatspace now, that big rainbow ⁂anderson ad on milk box blvd now says "office culture at anderson robotics is intensely transphobic and upper management turn a blind eye so they don't have to fire their best engineers"
ECHOES 16
HUMS 45
10:23 AM - 6 June 2019
|
post-optimus prime
⁂transistor
⁂syzygy It's true! I was fired by Anderson for reporting transphobic comments my boss made after I came out at work - no trans person has lasted more than 6 months on the R&D side.
ECHOES 5
HUMS 26
3:16 PM - 6 June 2019
Marshall, Carter and Dark
⁂mcd
⁂mcd … and that's all just since WWII. So yeah, if anyone shouldn't be allowed to pinkwash themselves, it's Marshall, Carter, and Dark. Happy #PrideMonth! [45/45]
ECHOES 60
HUMS 314
5:00 PM - 6 June 2019
Legolass Queenqueef
⁂elvendragqueen
The #PrideHacker is a hero - we just need them to move off of Void and onto Twitter. Mundane corporations need to be exposed, too!
ECHOES 17
HUMS 135
12:56 AM - 7 June 2019
The Sex Monk
⁂tonsuredaddy
⁂elvendragqueen
ECHOES 105
HUMS 886
6:35 AM - 7 June 2019
